Where Are You From?

I was born in Kirksville, Missouri, but lived in the small towns of Canton, Kahoka, and La Plata, Missouri, before starting kindergarten in Clarinda, Iowa. In first grade, I attended schoolin Kirksville. In second grade, I was in La Plata. In third grade, I attended Oakwood Elementary School in Hannibal. In fourth grade, I moved across town and attended Mark Twain Elementary. By the time I was nine years old, I had lived in eight different places. Then my parents got divorced.

While a student at Mizzou, I moved twelve times. Later, after graduating from college, Bethany and I lived with her sister Charla in Liberty, Missouri, for a short time before moving to Muncie, Indiana, for Bethany’s first job as an occupational therapist. After her three-month assignment ended, we moved back to Columbia for a year before buying our first house outside of Hartsburg, MO, in 1999, where we lived for fourteen years. When we outgrew that house, we bought a bigger one just down the road, one with an Ashland address. That is where we have lived ever since.

It's hard to give you a firm number if asked how many places I’ve lived. It’s safe to say that I have moved well over twenty times. The number of addresses I could technically claim to have lived at when counting all of my parents’ moves after their divorce is probably closer to forty.

Although I lived in Hannibal for ten years, I can’t really say I’m “from” Hannibal. My first five years of elementary school were spent in five different elementary schools in four different towns. I was the new kid every year. I wasn’t “from” anywhere. Even after graduating from Hannibal High School, I still didn’t feel fully accepted as a native of Twainland.

 

As is the case in most small towns, if you weren’t born here, you aren’t really “from here”. My bigger-than-life friend/Hannibal native David Arthaud captured that sentiment perfectly when he scared a non-Hannibalian who had had the audacity to chuckle at one of Dave’s jokes at a party. “What are you laughing at?!” Dave yelled as one of his meaty paws clamped down tight on the poor sap’s thigh, “You ain’t one of us!”

I never felt like I truly belonged anywhere—even Hannibal—until sometime around 2011. That’s when I decided to make Hartsburg/Ashland my adopted hometown. I started writing this newspaper column that summer, and in 2012, I began subbing at Southern Boone schools. I also started volunteering with Girl Scouts and Cub Scouts and at the Schools’ Learning Garden. I became the public address announcer for Eagles football and track. I became an ordained minister and started officiating weddings in the area. I even coached a couple of little league baseball teams. Eventually, I felt like I actually belonged here. I was home.

Ashland had become my hometown. Or had it? Ten years ago, I wrote a column about this very subject in which I said the following, “Something has been troubling me lately, however. In the aftermath of the recent school board scandal, I overheard some grumblings that suggested the problems were because of people living around here who weren’t really ‘Ashland people.’While I won’t weigh in on the facts/rumors flying around in the post-Deffenbaugh Letter era, I think equating non-natives with problems in our community is a dangerous precedent to set.”

A decade after the drama surrounding that iteration of the Southern Boone Board of Education caused me to worry about a potential crisis in the making within our community, letters of resignation from current board president Steve Condron and board secretary Amanda Centobie, and the board’s decision to not renew Superintendent Chris Felmlee’s contract, have reignited my concerns.

While following the drama between the current school board and some vocal board critics/candidates, it has become clear to me that the divide I first perceived ten years ago is in fact quite real. There are two types of citizens in Southern Boone County: Those who are “from here” and those who are not. Just like me, Chris, Steve, and Amanda call Southern Boone home, but just like me, they are not native to this area. It is apparent that there is a concerted effort by some Southern Boone natives to take control of the school district in order to promote a return to so-called “Ashland values”.

From my 2012 column: “SoBoCo is a microcosm of America. It is a melting pot. With the possible exception of any Ashland-area Native Americans who may still be living here, the overwhelming majority of area families migrated here from somewhere else. People with a dream of making a better life for their children and for themselves continue to be welcomed to our community year after year. Folks from all walks of life are making our small town a diverse and enlightened one. While uninhibited growth can present problems, Ashland is one of the few towns in Missouri (and possibly the nation) that continues to build new homes, businesses, schools, libraries, and infrastructure despite the national economic downturn, while still maintaining its down-home, farming-community feel.”

Ten years ago, I wrote, “The reason for Ashland’s success: the people. Farmers and entrepreneurs. Young and old. Black, White, Asian, and Hispanic.  Life-long residents and recent transplants. We are all “Ashland people” and I am proud to call Ashland/Hartsburg/Wilton my hometown(s).”

 

Well folks, in 2022 I don’t feel nearly as proud or as optimistic as I did in 2012. And unless the tone of public discourse in Southern Boone County improves quickly and drastically, I will be less inclined to answer “Ashland” when people ask me where I’m from. We must come together as a community and rise above the “othering” of our fellow citizens.

 

If we fail to treat our neighbors with acceptance, love, and respect, then Ashland won’t be my hometown for much longer.