April 5, etc...

Travis Naughton, planner/blogger. Many Blog Daddy fans in my inner circle already have heard the news that I will announce to the rest of the world on April 5th. For those of you not in the know just yet- don't fret. I will make my news public when the time is right. Until then, stay tuned for more frequent forays into the tangents of my life's journey. That was a fancy sounding sentence wasn't it? Wow, I still impress/confuse myself.

Travis Naughton, retail god. Our store's sales in February were 64% higher than in February '07. Excluding Decembers (holiday shopping), it was the best sales month in our store's nine year history. Plus it was only a 29 day month and we had several days of miserable weather to boot. What recession? That manager kicks ass.

Travis Naughton, Irishman. In honor of my Irish heritage, I will live up to the negative stereotypes of my people on St. Patrick's Day. I plan on visiting Paddy Malone's Irish Pub in Jeff City owned by my friend from Hannibal, Alan Tatman. There I will drink several frothy, fermented beverages of Irish origin; sing a few ditties about potatoes, women, and fighting; and keep a tally of times I am slapped in the face by ladies who don't appreciate hearing "Lemme see your lucky charms!" I'm not Catholic, so I shouldn't worry about the Pope sending me to Hell for unruly behavior on such a holy day, should I? Besides, I'm the one who's Irish, not his Holiness. In fact, I'm so Irish I shit leprechauns. It's true. Ask anybody.

Travis Naughton, seaman. Boy, I hope I spelled that right. My dad is buying a newer fishing boat and is going to sell his old vessel to me. It is a 14 foot v-bottom aluminum boat with trailer. Currently it is dad-powered with oars, but will be upgraded to at least an electric trolling motor if not a small gas-powered motor soon. Other improvements will include a beverage cooler, a luxury cabin below decks, a big screen HDTV, a full galley, and a horn that plays "Anchors Aweigh" kinda like how the General Lee plays "Dixie" when the Duke boys fly over a ramp coincidentally located in the middle of a paved city street or at the end of a gravel road with a washed-out bridge ahead. Don't worry, I already have a life vest. Dad knew that I would need it because I swim like a rock. I chalk up my natural lack of buoyancy to my ultra-low body fat index as is evidenced by my washboard abs.

Travis Naughton, excavator/construction worker. Phase two of "Del Boca Vista", or as it is commonly called "The Party Porch" has begun. I broke ground on the goldfish pond during the fortuitous, albeit brief, warm weather snap we enjoyed last weekend. With nothing more than a wooden-handle spade I plan on excavating a 8' by 12' wide pond that will be four to five feet deep. It will be landscaped with stones from our land and a few native Missouri plants (weeds). It will feature a waterfall, underwater lights, and a few dozen goldfish and/or bait minnows set free after failed fishing excursions. Upon completion of the pond, I will shift my efforts toward re-roofing the shack so that torrential rains and heavy snows do not soak party-goers and furnishings currently protected under unsightly tarps. Well, party goers aren't currently under tarps. You know what I mean. At any rate, you'll have to plan on spending a few summer evenings under the stars overlooking the pond while enjoying some brews with your favorite blogger, manager, Irishman, sailor, and builder in Southern Boone County. (That's me just so you know.)

The photo? That's from an online St. Patty's Day scavenger hunt photo contest a buddy of mine hosted a while back. I won. Alex took the picture. It's okay to weep for the future.