Blogger vs. Writer

I have toyed with the idea of writing a novel in the past. However in the case of my life, the truth is stranger (and funnier) than fiction. Frankly, I don't need to make stuff up. Have you met me and my family? I have long struggled with finding a format that would allow me to write within my comfort zone. At long last it finally "clicked" for me. David Sedaris has had many of his essays published in various magazines and eventually he compiled them into several volumes that have become New York Times best sellers. Who says I couldn't do the same thing?

I have been a blogger for about four years now. It is a fun way for me to express myself without having to worry, like so many writers do, about pleasing an editor or offending an advertiser. So am I not a writer even though I only write on this blog? I have now posted over 350 times on this blog plus several more on two other blogs to which I contribute. I wondered how many of those could be considered good enough to be labeled "essays" (with some re-writing here and there) and eventually published in book form. So yesterday I actually went all the way back to the beginning of my blog and culled 23 posts from the herd. I saved them to a folder on my computer where I plan to fine-tune them into what could perhaps be construed as examples of "professional writing." I also came up with 25 more essay ideas that I will try to add to that collection. My plan is to shape each essay into an 8 to 12 page "chapter" and to assemble 12 to 15 chapters into a book. If successful, my goal is to publish 2 or 3 books in this fashion. With 48 essay ideas and counting, I just may be able to pull this off.

"But how are you going to get it published?" you ask. Good question. If anyone has any ideas, I would love to hear them. For now, the best plan I can come up with involves accosting David Sedaris when he comes to Jesse Hall in April and forcing him to take a copy of my manuscript. Then I will begin harassing him, his agent, and his publisher until they agree to take a chance on me or file a restraining order. If all else fails, I could self-publish my first book and when online sales go through the roof and threaten to crash Amazon.com's servers, any publisher with a desire to get stinking rich would of course drive a truckload of money to my front door to sign on for the follow-up. It could happen.