So You Wish You Were Retired?

I may not have a paying job, but rumors of my care-free unemployment have been greatly exaggerated. It may seem that my beautiful wife works two jobs while I just sit on the couch watching soaps and eating bon-bons all day, but nothing could be further from the truth. How many of you have had to make a living raising a Naughton Boy? Walk a mile in my shoes and you may no longer envy my "retirement". Its true, I enjoy not having to be a part of the rat race anymore. However, I would venture to guess that the past week has been the stress equivalent of two years of pressure-packed work in the "real world". In just two days this past week, my four year old Spawn of Satan fed our fish a year's worth of food in one feeding, played with and talked to a dead bunny like it was his favorite toy, and pissed in not one but both of our dogs' water bowls. (I guess you could say he loves animals to death!) Not stressful enough for you? Try dealing with a virtual clone of yourself full- time! Come on, you remember the Hell you put your parents through.